Well, this is it. I’m gonna do it. I’m gonna talk about sex. On my blog. For all of you to read. This is your final warning: if you don’t want to read about sex then stop now! Don’t go any further.

Seriously. STOP now. Don’t scroll down anymore!

For a while I have been thinking about this post. It has been the creature that looms up behind me while I’m trying to write something wholesome and Momma. I think the best thing for me will be to get it out of my system. I just want to let you know before I start that I’m not that kind of girl *giggle behind hand*. Okay, well, maybe I am that kind of girl but you all seem to like me anyway so here goes.

First-the sex. Sex feels good. It’s fun. It’s good for you. Sex is about being physical. It is an action, a part of something bigger. When you have monsters though, the rate and frequency in which sex is a part of your life diminishes a bit. For a while. You learn to cope. You learn to lock your doors. You get a bit creative. You learn to be more quiet. Eventually, the monsters get older and they learn to be freaked out by the thought that their parents have sex and they give you some space.

Now, for the romance. Romance creates a feeling. It’s about your surroundings. It’s about your insides. It is intimacy. Do you know what your partner likes? Have you ever told your partner what you like? Do you have a list? I’m not saying get out a pen and a paper and take notes while you are talking. But commit it to memory when your lover tells you what they like. If you have short term memory issues then, yes, write it down at some point. What kind of flowers, what kind of candles, bubble bath, music? Lingerie. Dark Chocolate. Sushi. ACDC? (I may have said too much.) This is not rocket science. You don’t have to provide every single piece of romance at every single encounter. A little bit goes a long way.

And romance doesn’t have to culminate in sex. When you get home from work in the evening-how do you greet your partner? Do you come in and heave the bits of work life out onto the floor or do you slip in quietly and sneak a hug from behind? Do you greet your partner at the door or let their arrival go by unnoticed?

Stop on the way home and pick up a little something sweet or pretty for your partner. Write a simple love note for them (a haiku is fast and easy: just remember 5-7-5). Foot rubs that are just foot rubs. A massage with no expectation.

I like candles, dark chocolate, soft fabric, eye lash kisses, sometimes soft music, sometimes loud and raucous, dark chocolate, massages, kisses, strawberries, sushi and dark chocolate. And I thought this picture was kind of neat.  And pretty darn sexy.

chocolate-fondue.jpg

Advertisements